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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27043198">Teenager In Love</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/retroberly/pseuds/retroberly'>retroberly</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>IT - Stephen King</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Bill Denbrough - Freeform, Bill Denbrough oneshots, F/M, IT - Freeform, IT 2017 - Freeform, Teenager in Love</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 19:02:00</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>16,961</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27043198</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/retroberly/pseuds/retroberly</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>❝ you return like autumn, and I fall every time❞</p><p>❝ I miss my lover, man ❞</p><p>❝ found you ❞</p><p>❀° ┄───────╮<br/>angst + fluff is available<br/>╰───────┄ °❀</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Bill Denbrough/Reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. DISCLAIMERS</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>ғᴇᴍᴀʟᴇ ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ ɪɴsᴇʀᴛ<br/>
⟣➵ ⚡️<br/>
© ʀᴇʀᴛʀᴏʙᴇʀʟʏ, Oɴᴇsʜᴏᴛs</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Suicidal</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Monday<br/>7:35 am</p>
<p>THIRD PERSON'S POV</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Y/n l/n was just like any other teenager in Derry. She wasn't perfect. But let's face facts; Is there even anything perfect in Derry, Maine? The school system is terrible, Derry adults don't care about what's happening to kids, The weather was awful at most days, and The kids are awfully annoying. Y/n could go on and on about the flaws in this small town. But if she did, she would be late for school.</p>
<p>The sun was out this morning, most likely smiling. It's like it's giving a sign that Today is gonna be a good day. However, good days don't exist in y/n's world. For crying out loud, good isn't even in her vocabulary. Give y/n a word, and all her replies are synonymous to bad. Grades? Bad. Mental health? Terrible. Socializing? Horrible. Friends? Dreadful. Home? Wack. Y/n? Suicidal. Hotel? Trivago.</p>
<p>It's safe to say that y/n was everything you wish you never will be. What's one thing y/n's good at? Judging everyone around her. What else would she do? Flirt? There isn't anyone decent in this hellhole. She doesn't have high standards, everyone is just crappy. </p>
<p>Everyone could tell that y/n was different than other girls. She never wore dresses, despises the color pink, into rock songs, always had her h/c hair tied up. Y/n never considered finding love. It's a waste of time and energy. She always thought love would just bump itself to her. </p>
<p>Well, she was right about the bumping part. </p>
<p>Monday morning, Stutterer Bill Denbrough bumped into her. He mumbled a little sorry avoiding eye contact, waiting for y/n to reply. The girl didn't answer. She stared right into his eyes, nodded, and then made her way to the art class.</p>
<p>Bill bumping into her was the closest she ever came in contact with a boy. But she didn't really mind. Their small interaction wasn't on y/n's mind anymore. Other thoughts roamed in her head. Suicidal thoughts. How she'll hurt herself. Where she'll cut. What time. Everything. She was basically planning her death. </p>
<p>Bill, On the other hand, was slightly taken away from y/n's coldness. Bill always knew <br/>y/n needed affection. He even saw it in her eyes. Why else would a teen act like that? But his friends were scared of her. Not physically, though, y/n is actually a pretty girl. The Losers were actually frightened of what she'll say. Everyone knows that y/n has a lot of awful things to say to everyone. But she always kept silent. Waiting for the best moment to strike. And when she attacks, you never win. </p>
<p>Arts class was one of Bill's favorite subjects. Bill being extraordinary well in art, is an understatement, he never misses any detail. There was a project due next week, and it's done by pair. The project was about emphasis. Y/n was the first person to pop in Bill's mind. She has a strong character, they were opposites. She was an artwork. Perfect for a masterpiece.</p>
<p>The only problem was how to ask her. The poor boy can't control his stutter. He's sure that y/n would find it annoying. </p>
<p>"H-Hey y/n, so do y-y-you want to be p-p-par-partners f-f-f-for the p-pro-project?" It took a while for Bill to spit it out. He kept on stuttering. Getting much more embarrassed every second he's in front of her.</p>
<p>"Okay." Y/n replied coldly.</p>
<p>Y/n always thought that there's nothing else special about Bill Denbrough, just his stutter. Y/n never found Bill's stutter cute. She thought it was taking up too much time. Especially when Bill had to read a paragraph during their English class. Yeah, her grades suck, but she just wanted to get school over with.  English was their last class, and when Bill was reading, they were ordered to stay in the classroom even after the bell. Cause William Denbrough can't even finish a single paragraph. </p>
<p>"C-ca-can we do t-the project at yo-your house a-af-after s-sch-school?" Bill says.</p>
<p>"Are you inviting yourself to my home? No way, Denbrough. The project's due is still far anyways."</p>
<p>"I j-ju-just thought w-we could get to kn-kn-know each o-other. Maybe think a-ab-about what we're g-g-go-gonna d-do."</p>
<p>"Fine, just so we can get this over with. We're partners in a project, Denbrough. Not friends." Y/n replies sternly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Monday<br/>Lunch</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"You're partners with THE y/n fucking l/n," Richie yelled.</p>
<p>"I'm not sure which I'm more surprised at. You had the guts to talk to y/n or y/n actually agreeing to be your partner." Stan says</p>
<p>"Y/n agreeing to be Bill's partner for sure has to be a trick," Bev says, chuckling.</p>
<p>"W-w-why are you g-g-gu-guys saying that like I'm a t-ter-terrible partner in a p-project?" Bill asks with offended written all over his face.</p>
<p>"She's right there, don't yell something embarrassing. I have my eyes on you, Richie." Bev says sternly. </p>
<p>Y/n was just minding her business when Greta spilled food all over her. There wasn't much damage to y/n's outfit. She was wearing all black, the spilled food wasn't apparent. But<br/>y/n didn't let this slide. She grabbed Eddie's cup and spilled the water all over Greta's face. </p>
<p>"HEY! I DON'T LIKE SHARING MY CUP." Eddie defends</p>
<p>"I don't think you want to get into this mess," Ben says</p>
<p>"Oh no, Let me just get a refill real quick." <br/>Y/n says with an innocent smile.</p>
<p>"You're pretty fucked up, y/n," Greta says slowly.</p>
<p>"What was that waterfall? Can't hear you over the splash of water coming from your waterfall." y/n laughs before taking a sip of water.</p>
<p>"I SAID YOU'RE"</p>
<p>Greta was cut off by another cold sensation of water all over her face. And when she thought y/n was done, Y/n spitted out the water she took a while ago.</p>
<p>"Ms. l/n, My office now." The Principal says.</p>
<p>"Bye-bye, waterfall." </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Monday <br/>Lunch<br/>The Losers' table</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Ever thought of picking someone less psychotic?" Richie jokes</p>
<p>"B-b-Beep-Beep R-Ri-Richie," Bill replies.</p>
<p>"When will you guys start with the project?"</p>
<p>"T-t-to-today after s-school, My h-hou-house."</p>
<p>"If she starts hanging out with us. Don't get surprised that one of us will be dead by dawn." Richie says laughing</p>
<p>"Shut up, Just shut up, Richie," Eddie interjects. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Monday<br/>Lunch<br/>Principal's Office</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Sup Bowers. For sure didn't expect you to be here." y/n says with pure sarcasm.</p>
<p>"Same with you, l/n."</p>
<p>"What'd you do this time?"</p>
<p>"I Punched the new kid. I don't even know his name. Tim? Jeff? Ben? I could care less. How bout you? Who'd you nitpick this time?"</p>
<p>"Bowie"</p>
<p>"Isn't that like the third time this week?"</p>
<p>"Funny that you can keep track."</p>
<p>"Psycho"</p>
<p>"Thanks." y/n says, smiling. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Monday<br/>After School<br/>3:42 pm</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Y/n and Bill would always have brief eye contact when going home. There are only five houses in between their houses. They would've been best friends. But y/n never went out after school. She was always inside her room, having deep and dark thoughts every single day. </p>
<p>"My ho-house a-at 4?" Bill asks.</p>
<p>"See you." </p>
<p>Y/n still had time to execute her plan. She can't do it after their project, her parents would be home at that time. </p>
<p>Her plan was to harm herself. Not on her arms but on her knees. She thought if she cuts on her arms, people will immediately assume she hurt herself. Everyone knowing about her suicidal thoughts would be the last thing she wanted to do. Actually, It isn't even one of the things she wants to do. She then slit a few on her knees. She could use the excuse that she fell off her bike on the way home. She was smart at this part. She then cleaned it off with a disinfectant, not even once hissed in pain. She was used to it. Other than the disinfectant cleaning the cut, there was also another benefit for y/n. She loves the pain when the alcohol hits her wounds. That's why she would always give time in cleaning the cuts. </p>
<p>Y/n then put away her clothes with spilled food and blood to the laundry and decided not to wear an all-black outfit. She wore a pastel yellow oversized shirt, tucking it in her black denim shorts. She tied up her hair and finally slipped on her black vans. She didn't really bother looking presentable. There wasn't anyone to impress. Not that she would actually dress to impress. </p>
<p>Bill, went all out in getting ready. He even thought that 18 minutes weren't enough time for him to look presentable. And that is a bad thing cause boys usually get ready quickly. He had to call Stanley to ask for his outfit's approval, and what to do so he won't mess things up. Truth be told, Bill didn't just think of y/n as a useful reference in an art project, Bill also has a tiny crush on her. Nobody knows, and nobody should know. Not my brother, not y/n, and especially not the Losers. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Monday<br/>After School at Bill's house<br/>4:00 pm</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Y/n was welcomed by Bill's Dad, Zack. The girl mumbled, thanks to Zack. Before running into Bill's little brother.</p>
<p>"I'm sorry, but can you show me where Bill's room is?" She asks with a small smile.</p>
<p>"He's in his room, talking to Stan about this girl named"</p>
<p>"H-hey y/n, I'm s-s-so-sorry I needed to get the ma-materials for our project." Bill cuts Georgie off.</p>
<p>"W-we-we'll do the p-project in my room."</p>
<p>"Mhmm. Thanks." y/n says, waiting for Bill's brother to say his name.</p>
<p>"I'm Georgie."</p>
<p>"Right, Georgie." </p>
<p>The two teenagers then went up to Bill's bedroom. His room was neat and organized. The fact that a boy's room is tidier than my place is weird, Y/n thought to herself. What she did expect is that his wall was filled with artworks. Colorful and bright artworks. She looked at each and every one of them, envious of how they have color, but she didn't have any. She felt like a mistake. A mistake that was the reason why the artist discontinued the masterpiece. An error that was easily ripped, crumpled, and thrown into the trash bin.</p>
<p>Bill noticed how focused y/n was on his art. He thought she was finding something to take against him, He felt that she would find every flaw the drawing has and call him out on it. But he was wrong. Y/n looked into his eyes, smiled and, complimented his work. Explaining how he didn't miss a single detail. Bill was, for sure, taken away by her act. He never knew that y/n could think of a compliment. Bill never saw this side of her, the soft and innocent side. Oh boy, how he loved that side. </p>
<p>"Cmon Bill, We should probably start. I'm going home by 5:30-ish."</p>
<p>"R-ri-right"</p>
<p>"You're the artistic one, think of something."</p>
<p>"Ho-how about we m-ma-make the b-ba-background dark like a bl-black or navy blue. A-after that, we pa-paint a g-g-gi-girl that we will g-gi-give emphasis on. Then w-we'll paint the ob-object in bright colors so it'll s-sta-stand out." </p>
<p>Y/n went silent. She understands what Bill wants to do. But she can't help but think of herself in that situation. In a dark place, desperate to find the artist who'll make her happy and bright. Maybe Bill could be her artist. But they both knew it was impossible. He was a Loser, and she was a bully, Opposites. Bill would always convince himself that opposites attract, giving him a tint of hope to make it work. Y/n, on the other hand, was trying her hardest to never think about that idea ever again. There was no Hope in y/n's life, and she was sure of that. </p>
<p>"That sounds nice. Did you just thought of that right now?"</p>
<p>"Not really. I-I've been thinking about what I'll do with the po-pro-project since lunchtime. There's t-th-this girl that's in our art class, she was m-m-my reference."</p>
<p>"Does this girl know that you made her your reference for art?"</p>
<p>"No, But she w-w-will soon."</p>
<p>"Why is that?"</p>
<p>"Cause this artwork is basically about h-h-her life. I'm sure she'll n-no-notice it sooner or later."</p>
<p>"Who is it?"</p>
<p>"Well, if I tell you, you'll think you can get <br/>i-inf-information from me easily. Then where's the fun in that?" Bill chuckles.</p>
<p>"I'll know who it is. And I'll make a rumor that you like this girl, maybe even love, or maybe even obsessed." Y/n then continues to ramble about things she'll do, threatening Bill to tell her who the mystery girl is. </p>
<p>But what'll happen if y/n knew that it was her all along? Bill doesn't think she'll spread rumors about herself. But what if the stories were half true? Well, Bill did like the girl. Bill liked y/n.  </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Tuesday<br/>After school at Bill's house<br/>3:39 pm</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Are you okay? You l-loo-looked sad, and I was k-ki-kinda getting c-con-concerned."</p>
<p>"Could you think of another question? I don't know the answer to "Are you okay?" It just sounds common, It's like people just expect you to say you're fine. You're not concerned, you're just being polite and doing the right thing."</p>
<p>Bill just sat there thinking of what to say. She was kinda right. You shouldn't expect someone to tell you what they actually feel when you ask if they're okay. </p>
<p>"You don't need to say anything. Just go continue your part of the project." Y/n says before she lets out a sigh</p>
<p>"I think I know what you need. I have emotional jumper cables. Just attach them like so." Bill says without stuttering.</p>
<p>Bill then wrapped his arms around y/n and hugged her from behind with a huge smile.</p>
<p>Y/n was shocked by his sudden touch. She forgot what a hug felt like. She also has forgotten how comforting a hug was. </p>
<p>"So this is what a hug feels like, huh?" y/n says as she enjoys the warmth of someone's comforting and loving touch.</p>
<p>"Is it w-wo-wor-working?"</p>
<p>"It sure is. Thank you."</p>
<p>The hug lasted a few minutes. This was what y/n needed. An emotional reset. Y/n felt a lot better after the hug. She felt motivated, actually. Y/n even started to look forward to more hangouts. </p>
<p>They eventually wrapped it up for the day since y/n was gonna be late for dinner. Y/n even gave Bill a quick hug as thanks for the day. The girl immediately went to her bike and yelled a quick bye, leaving the boy dumbfounded.  </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Wednesday<br/>Lunch</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"There's no way you survived the hangout with y/n," Stanley says, still not believing y/n stepping inside a Loser's home.</p>
<p>"She w-wa-was actually f-fu-fun to be with, she was smi-smiling, and she even c-c-co-complimented my art."</p>
<p>"I don't think y/n l/n is even capable of laughing, What makes you think we'll believe you when you say she complimented your work and hugged you?" Richie asks</p>
<p>"In defense, Bill's drawings are actually pretty good." Eddie defends</p>
<p>"I d-did saw s-so-something shocking."</p>
<p>"Never knew you would get to see a girl naked," Richie says while laughing hysterically.</p>
<p>"Beep fucking Beep Richie," Beverly says with a glare directed at Richie.</p>
<p>"She had wo-wounds a-a-and s-s-sc-scars."</p>
<p>"Shit. Do you think she harms herself?" Beverly asks concerned</p>
<p>" She s-s-said she fell o-o-off her bike on t-t-the way to my ho-hou-house, so I didn't t-thi-think of it much."</p>
<p>"You think she disinfected it?" Eddie asks as the germaphobe he is.</p>
<p>"That's not really relevant, Eddie," Stanley said as he rolled his eyes.</p>
<p>Ben didn't talk much, he just had confusion written all over his face. Ben's house was just beside y/n's. Ben saw a blade, a cutter, a razor. Scattered all over her table. He was actually the only one who knows about this. He's probably the one with much information about y/n, just because he was her neighbor. </p>
<p>He knows y/n didn't fall off her bike. He was on his way to the library, and he saw y/n rode her bike to Bill's house, and he was sure she didn't get off balance and fell. </p>
<p>But why would y/n lie about her scars? Does it connect to the blades she owned? Ben thought.</p>
<p>He chose to keep quiet and not tell anyone what he knows. It's not his business anyways. And it might be a little too personal for y/n's liking. Y/n may be a bully, but Ben has a kind heart, and he chose not to ruin her reputation. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Thursday<br/>After school at Bill's house<br/>3:54 pm</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"H-hey y/n?"</p>
<p>"Wh-why do y-yo-you get new w-w-w-wounds e-every day?"</p>
<p>"I'm clumsy, and the neighbor's cat isn't really fond of me."</p>
<p>"D-do-don't worry, y/n, I can be your protector," Bill says, smiling.</p>
<p>"Anyways, I've been starting on the explanation. Don't worry about the presentation anymore."</p>
<p>"Alright," Bill replies as y/n sat down on his bed, focusing on the work.</p>
<p>"Do you want to s-s-sit with us on our table?" Bill says out of the blue.</p>
<p>"I'm surprised you Losers even have a table. But, yes, just make sure you'll prevent me from getting sent to the Principal's office."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Friday<br/>Lunch<br/>The Losers' table</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Y/n did sit with the Losers. Everyone was dead silent. Which is very shocking since Trashmouth always has something to say. The awkwardness was killing Bill. But y/n? She didn't mind the silence. She liked the silence more than trashmouth's annoying voice anyways. Y/n knew the Losers don't want her here, but she really doesn't care. It's better to sit on a table with a bunch of Losers than spend lunch with bowers in the Principal's office. </p>
<p>"So y/n, you and ben are neighbors, right?" Bev says, breaking the silence.</p>
<p>"I'm not sure I don't know the name of my neighbors. But I do know them by face." Y/n replied, not looking up from her lunch.</p>
<p>"Which one of you is Ben?" Y/n asks as she tilted her head.</p>
<p>Bill pointed to that kid who Henry was recently bullying.</p>
<p>"Oh, you're Bowers' little pet." Y/n mumbles chuckling.</p>
<p>"What?" Ben asks, slightly offended.</p>
<p>"Today, after school, Bowers is gonna take you to the kissing bridge and carve his name on your chest. He'll wait for you outside the library. If I were you, I'd lock myself in my room." y/n says to him with no emotion whatsoever.</p>
<p>"How'd you even get this information? Are you a fortune teller or something? A wizard? A witch? " Richie asks, nearly yelling.</p>
<p>"Principal's office with Bowers, almost every day." y/n replies.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Friday<br/>After school at Bill's house<br/>4:58 pm</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Cmon Bill, rate our work on the scale of 1-10." y/n says</p>
<p>"a nine, you know why? Cause I'm the one that you need." Bill replies without stuttering.</p>
<p>"Sly little bitch. Were you just flirting with me?" Y/n asks flustered.</p>
<p>"Have been for the past week, but thanks for noticing," Bill says with a smirk painted on his face.</p>
<p>"Whatever Loser. I got the explanation done, so just leave the presentation to me." </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Monday<br/>Presentation Day</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"In conclusion, The black canvas has colors now. The girl was healed now." y/n finishes off with a smile.</p>
<p>Bill was relieved that he didn't have to read in front of the whole class. He thought y/n did that so he can save the embarrassment, but y/n joked that she thought his stutter was too time-consuming. </p>
<p>"Thank you, y/n, and Bill, you made a masterpiece."</p>
<p>Y/n just gave a smile to the teacher and went back to her seat beside Bill. Bill then mumbled a little thanks to their teacher.</p>
<p>"4:00 Today after school, at my house. Does that sound good?"</p>
<p>"We f-f-fi-fin-finished the project already tho," Bill says, confused.</p>
<p>"We're friends, and friends hang out after school, right?"</p>
<p>"Yeah, see y-yo-you then."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Monday<br/>after school at y/n's room<br/>4:09 pm</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Sorry if my rooms messy, I don't really like cleaning."</p>
<p>"No, no, It's f-f-fine." </p>
<p>Bill examined y/n's room. It was painted with a dark shade of blue. Her room wasn't filled with posters of boy bands, just like any other girl in Derry. Her room filled with pictures of the sky and trees she took with her polaroid camera. She was quite a great photographer, he thought to himself.</p>
<p>Bill continued to look at her shots in awe. But when he saw the sharp things that were set on her table. His mind went to many places. Thinking why she has this. </p>
<p>"Why do you have this?" Bill asks with pure concern</p>
<p>"That's what I wanted to talk to you about."</p>
<p>"I want to die, Bill," y/n says with no emotion.</p>
<p>"Wh-what? Why?"</p>
<p>"But then you came along." Y/n says, ignoring his question.</p>
<p>"Me?"</p>
<p>"Well, Denbrough. The more I spend time with you, the more I felt happy. I like you, Bill. You managed to make me feel emotions. When I realized I wanted you. I also understood that I was afraid to die because I finally had something to lose. You." </p>
<p>This was a whole different side of y/n. The side that only Bill Denbrough knows. The side that they both never knew existed.</p>
<p>"That's kinda relieving. The girl in our project likes me back," Bill says with a huge smile.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank You for reading !!!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Lemonade</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Third Person's POV:</p><p>It was a bright and sunny Saturday. Y/n, like the angel she is, was at the Denbrough's to help Georgie sell lemonade. Other than spending time with Georgie, she thought she would get a free glass of lemonade by tagging along. She also felt bad that nobody was willing to help him, so she canceled all her Saturday plans.</p><p>She helped him make posters, set up the cups and tables, and make the lemonade. The other Losers weren't helpful since they said they would arrive once the lemonade is ready. </p><p>Bill was busy with a school project. Y/n knew he was doing something else; it was fucking summer. What the hell was more important than having time with Georgie? </p><p> </p><p>Bill's POV:</p><p>All the Losers were in my room talking, and Y/n doesn't know that. I'm 110% sure that y/n would get mad once she knew that I didn't invite her. We were talking about my feelings, and I don't want y/n here since I'll probably end up admitting that I've had my eye on her for a while now. </p><p>But it was harder to keep the "meeting" a secret since y/n volunteered to help Georgie. When she asked why I couldn't help them,  I got too nervous and said I was working on a school project. Then I realized it was summer, and that's when I knew I fucked up. Y/n probably didn't buy it, but Georgie asked for help, so she just shrugged and didn't ask any more follow up questions. </p><p>"I don't even know why you're confused about your feelings. Everyone in this fucking room knows you love y/n, even your pet hamster knows it." Richie retorts.</p><p>"Remember when Bill used to get all the girls? I Bet that Bill is laughing now." Eddie jokes.</p><p>"I don't want bitches, bitches want me." I replied</p><p>"So, you're calling y/n a bitch?" Bev mumbles.</p><p>"W-what?" I stammered.</p><p>"No shit, sherlock. Y/n probably likes Bill."</p><p>"Bev, you know something, spit it out," Stan states sternly.</p><p>"I remember her ranting something about her dream, and one of you losers are in it. y/n said she lost the loser, then woke up and realized; she can't lose someone she never had." Bev replies, hesitating.</p><p>"Never knew y/n was poetic," Ben commented.</p><p>"I mean it's gotta be Bill, right? It's the only logical choice." Mike interjects.</p><p>"Stan knows a way on how to know if you love someone," Eddie says as he elbows Stan.</p><p>"I do?"</p><p>"Yeah, fucker, you do."</p><p>"Oh, right...So this is how to know if you have fallen in love with your best friend." Stanley says with a smile forming on his face.</p><p>"You thought of them right now," Stan finishes with a smirk.</p><p>"Nope, t-th-this is stupid," I say, half embarrassed.</p><p>"I could've thought o-of Stanley or Mike or Bev o-or Ri-richie or Ben." I ramble</p><p>"But you didn't cause you thought of"</p><p>"Y/n," Richie sang. </p><p>They all started teasing and laughing. It was later on cut off by y/n talking on our walkie talkies. Oh, how I love y/n's angelic voice.</p><p>"Hey, Losers, Georgie's Lemonade stand is open. Thanks for the help, by the way," y/n says with pure sarcasm.</p><p>"Thanks a-again, y/n," I say with a smile.</p><p>"Hurry up before Richie buys all of it."</p><p>"What is that supposed to mean?" Richie says, laughing.</p><p>"It means come over quick." y/n replies.</p><p>"Alright, Jeez." Eddie sassed. </p><p>Saturday<br/>12:31 noon<br/>Lemonade Stand</p><p> </p><p>Third Person's POV:</p><p>"25 cents per glass, Richie," Georgie says sternly.</p><p>"What? Hey Georgie, I'm your pal. You could just give me one for free." Richie replied as he tries to convince Georgie and y/n not to charge him.</p><p>"Business is Business, Rich." Y/n says.</p><p>"One more lemonade, please," Stan says as he hands Georgie 25 cents.</p><p>"Thank you for paying, Stanley," Georgie says as he emphasized the word paying.</p><p>"How bout you, Bill, you want one?" y/n asks.</p><p>"Only if it's free," Bill jokes.</p><p>"You're seriously making your brother bankrupt." y/n says</p><p>"I'm j-joking."</p><p>"Greetings, ladies and gentlemen. Would you be a kind lad and give me some lemonade?" Richie cuts Bill off with his terrible British accent and fake mustache.</p><p>"Richie?" Georgie asks with the biggest smile.</p><p>"Who's Richie? What a wonderful name. I Believe that this "Richie" must be a perfect looking boy." Richie says</p><p>"That would be 25 cents for the lemonade, mister."</p><p>"Sure thing, young fellow," Richie says as he hands his payment.</p><p>"Enjoy your drink," y/n says with a sweet smile.</p><p>"Would you Losers mind helping Georgie for a while, I need to go home and do a few chores." y/n continues.</p><p>"I"ll walk y-y-you home," Bill says.</p><p>"You Losers better help Georgie sell lemonade." y/n announces.</p><p>"Will do," Ben replied.</p><p>Truth be told: y/n expected that the Losers won't help Georgie. They'll probably continue to ask for free lemonade. She felt bad that she left Georgie with them, but if she didn't do her weekend chores, her mom would give her more tasks as punishment. </p><p>"Leaving Georgie with the other Losers must be my biggest regret," y/n says, breaking the silence.</p><p>"Richie would p-probably go back at least ten times w-w-with a different outfit just to g-ge-get more," Bill chuckles.</p><p>"Why would he need to d-dre-dress up all the time a-and pretend he's s-s-someone else, though?" Bill asks</p><p>"Cause he's Richie, he likes wasting time. He also loves to see the Losers' smiles and laughs." y/n explained with a smile. Bill hums in agreement as he returned the smile.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Late Night Talks</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Bill Denbrough</p><p>"Hi Bill," a familiar voice said on the phone.   </p><p>"Oh, hey y/n."</p><p>"I'm sorry, did I wake you?"   </p><p>"Yeah, pretty m-m-much."  </p><p>"I'm sorry, I think you should go back to sleep. I shouldn't have called"</p><p>"No, no, I'm a-aw-awake al-already." I chuckle.    </p><p>"Oh, um great. So hey, do you wanna go to the park again?"</p><p>"Yeah yeah, sure. But w-wou-wouldn't your twin g-g-ge-get mad?"</p><p>"Richie's dead."</p><p>"What?" I whispered-yelled.    </p><p>"Asleep. Dead asleep. I'm sorry I'm lightheaded when It's past one am."</p><p> </p><p>I sigh, relieved that trashmouth is safe. As much as Richie is himself, it would be really dull without his inappropriate jokes. Bad influence, right?</p><p>"That's okay, see you in a few."</p><p>"Thanks, Bill," y/n replied as she ends the phone call.</p><p> </p><p>time skip</p><p>Y/n and I are currently sitting on the park's bench. No one really said anything yet. Just a small "hey" from y/n when I arrived at her front door. This is what my summer nights consist of. Getting fresh air with y/n. Acting like a couple even though we're not. Listening to y/n sing, and sometimes rant. </p><p>"You know you can't make this a h-h-hobby, right?" I blurted out.    </p><p>"Why not?"    </p><p>"Cause It's not safe for two teenagers to be out past m-m-mi-midnight. Oh y/n, what would happen if I don't go with y-you n-ne-next time?" I half-heartedly joke. </p><p>I think about this quite a lot.  I can't help but worry that something is going on, and that's why she escapes every night. But she always says that she just wanted fresh air. Why not open a window or something?  Don't get me wrong, I like spending time with y/n. I just feel like something terrible is gonna happen sooner or later. And usually, I'm right. </p><p>"You know I always pray to the heavens above that maybe...maybe someday, I'll find the courage to say what I really feel." y/n said, ignoring my question earlier.</p><p>"You could a-al-always tell me anything."</p><p>"There are things meant to be kept."</p><p>"You know I can see the sadness in your eyes, every night. It's like you're a totally di-dif-different person. The y/n Tozier I know, smiles. She's laughing, joking around with the losers. The y/n I know is trashmouth the second. That's why it's sh-sho-shocking to know that all that was just a well-presented facade."</p><p>Y/n shrugs, hesitating to answer. "I guess it's just midnight vibes."   </p><p>"Stay strong, my sunshine. I can't lose you." I admitted.</p><p>She laughs. "sunshine? That sounds like a girlfriend nickname."     </p><p>"Well if you want we could"    </p><p>"No way, Denbrough. Too young." She cuts me off.    </p><p>"We'll see Tozier, we'll see." </p><p>And for the first time tonight, y/n laughs. <br/>Y/n's laugh soon faded, and the yells of someone calling out my name replaced it. </p><p> </p><p>"Bill"  "Bill!!!"  "William,"  "Billiam!"  "Bill, please wake up." Their voices were too familiar. Too close, but that's impossible me and y/n are the only ones here in the park. </p><p>"BILLLLLLLLL!!!!"</p><p>I woke up, only too see all the Losers surrounding me. I look at where y/n was seated last night and saw that she wasn't there.</p><p>"W-w-wh-where's y/n? Why didn't she wake me up so I c-c-co-could walk her home?" I asked, slightly panicking.   </p><p>"Bill, please stop, y/n wouldn't want to see you like this," Bev says with real worry in her tone.    </p><p>"Why not? What are you saying? Why isn't s-s-sh-she here with you guys?" I yelled.    </p><p>"Bill stop, she's gone," Stan says as he tries to calm me down.    </p><p>"What do you mean, gone? She was right here last night. You guys are worrying me. Is this some k-ki-kind of prank? Y/n, you could come out now, Y/n? We're not kids anymore, we shouldn't play h-h-hide and seek a-an-n-anymore." I cried out as I got up and started to look for her. Behind the trees, near the slides, the swing, everywhere.    </p><p>"Bill stop, she's not here," Ben pleads.    </p><p>"Bill, please stop. She's gone," Mike says as he tries to stop me.    </p><p>"What do you m-me-mean, gone? She was h-h-he-here last night, I p-p-pr-pro-promise. Come on, Eds, you, b-b-be-bel-believe me, right?" I ask, nearly crying. I was a stuttering mess</p><p>Eddie stayed silent. Everyone else did too. </p><p>"Where's y/n? Come on, let's go pick her up. Why didn't y-y-yo-you guys go together, Richie? Guys? Why are you guys s-s-sa-sad, you guys are the one who forgot to bring her here."    </p><p>"She's dead, Bill," Richie muttered.    </p><p>"W-w-wha-what?" I ask cause I didn't hear him.    </p><p>"SHE'S DEAD, BILL. IS THAT WHAT YOU WANTED TO HEAR? Y/N'S DEAD. SHE'S BEEN MISSING IN ACTION FOR 2 MONTHS, BILL. BILL, SHE'S DEAD." Richie yelled as he broke down. </p><p>That's when it all came back to me.</p><p> </p><p>Flashback</p><p>"You're gonna go with me again tonight to the park, right?" y/n asks through the phone.</p><p>"Yeah, of course. 1:30 am, right?"</p><p>"Yep, I'll be waiting on the front porch, okay? See you, Bill."</p><p>"See you, y/n. G-go-go-goodnight for now."</p><p>"Goodnight"</p><p>2:05 am</p><p>Shit, shit, shit. I overslept, I hope y/n's still here.</p><p>"Hey y/n, I'm s-s-s-so-sorry I overslept. I'm very, v-v-very sorry." I say as I catch my breath since I ran all the way here.</p><p>Only, Y/n isn't here anymore. I was about to head back home and assume that she went back inside. When I saw a bloody shoe right in front of their house. My heartbeat quickened when I noticed that that wasn't just any bloody shoe. It was y/n's bloody shoe. I was sure of it. She wore that pair all the time cause the Losers designed it with her.</p><p>I then rushed to the front door and didn't hesitate to knock loudly even if it was past midnight.</p><p>"What are you doing here, Loser," Richie says, half asleep.    </p><p>"Is y/n h-ho-home?"    </p><p>"Woah Woah Woah loverboy. Couldn't wait till the morning?" Richie laughs.    </p><p>"Richie, I'm se-ser-serious. Where i-i-is she?"    </p><p>"She's probably in bed."    </p><p>"Then why is her sh-sh-sh-shoe outside covered in b-b-b-b-blood?"    </p><p>"Bill, is this some kind of prank?"    </p><p>"Richie, believe me. Look!"    </p><p>"Holy shit, this is her shoe."    </p><p>"What's going on here?" Richie's mom asks as she stepped outside.    </p><p>"Where's y/n?" Richie asks, trembling, worried.    </p><p>"I walked past your rooms, she isn't there. Why isn't she here with you guys?" Richie's mom asks, confused, and I could tell she was close to panicking.    </p><p>"Mom, it's y/n's shoe, covered in Blood," Richie says, trying to hide the fact that he's suspecting something worse happened to his twin.    </p><p>"You've gotta be kidding me."    </p><p>"It's not a jo-j-joke, Mrs. Tozier, something probably h-h-ha-happened to y/n."    </p><p>"DAD CALL THE COPS NOW." Richie cries out from outside the house, giving up on trying not to have a meltdown.</p><p> </p><p>-end of flashback- </p><p> </p><p>"It was m-m-m-my fault," I said, trying not to cry.</p><p>Mike tries to convince me. "No, it wasn't"</p><p>"If I just arrived earlier, I could've s-s-s-saved her."</p><p>"Bill, please stop, it's been 2 months."</p><p>"First Georgie, Now y/n? What will happen next? Who's next, huh? Why is everyone leaving?"</p><p>"We won't leave, Bill," Richie reassures me.</p><p>"You aren't m-m-ma-mad at me?"</p><p>"I don't think I have the energy to do so." </p><p> </p><p>Time skip</p><p>It's been half a year since y/n's death. The Losers stayed friends, but obviously, it isn't the same anymore. It's somewhat awkward. Everyone changed, all in a terrible way. Whenever we hang out, it was just silence. Nobody dared to talk about what has happened to the Losers since that day. You know we were always convinced that the good thing about being a Loser is we can't lose anything more. I'm sure that went well, huh? </p><p>I started writing to y/n everyday. Then I'll send it off to the wind. Convinced that somehow y/n will read it. </p><p>Y/n's death was the end of my happiness, my hope, my inspiration, our story.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>BONUS:</p><p>One of Bill's Letters to y/n: </p><p> </p><p>Dear y/n</p><p>How are you? Things must be quiet and peaceful up there, just like how you like it. I'm not really sure why I'm still hoping. But what can I do? I'm still head over heels for you after all these months. It doesn't really help much that I remember a memory with you with everything I see, no matter how random it is.</p><p>There's one thing I'm not fond of tho. How phony people at school are. They're acting nice, pretending to be your friend just so they'll get interviewed by the many journalists outside our school every day. Sucks that they're saying so many good things about you. I mean yeah, sure that's great. But those words were from GRETA AND HENRY. The bullies who made our lives a living hell.</p><p>After all these months we still don't know who's the killer. I'm sorry, I never gave up though. Neither did Richie or your parents or the Losers.</p><p>The Losers club feels gloomy now since you were gone, so there isn't much to say about them. But we're still friends, trying to figure out who's the sinner. Ben is really good at getting clues. Make sure to bless him, hehe.</p><p>I started writing books. Sucks that you're not here with me. You were so poetic, you could have really helped me write good books. You actually say a lot of wise words even though you're trashmouth the second.</p><p>The day still started even though you're not here with me. But the sunlight isn't that bright today compared to those days before, you were still with me. I miss you y/n every day, every moment, every second, I miss you so much. Hope to see you soon, my sunshine.</p><p>Always remind yourself that I never unliked you, nor unloved you. Even though you're not in my arms anymore. You are still here, right in my heart.</p><p>Cheers to my forever, my soulmate, my sunshine, trashmouth the second. The one that got away.</p><p>Sincerely,<br/>Bill Denbrough</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. The Imperfect Picnic Date</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Summer of 1989<br/>11:12 am</p><p> </p><p>Bill Denbrough</p><p> </p><p>I'm currently getting ready for y/n and I's picnic. It's not really much since I only have three colored shirts and five flannels. Asking advice from Stan isn't the best idea either. For real, can you imagine me with my shirt tucked in, hair slicked back, without a flannel? Yeah, me neither.</p><p> </p><p>"Who are you? What did you do to my brother?" Georgie asks with wide eyes, fists up. "Is i-it that b-bad?" I ask as I turn around to face Georgie. "Yeah, you look like Stanley and Eddie all in one."</p><p> </p><p>"I'm g-go-going on a picnic w-with y/n." "What picnic?" Richie interjects through the walkie talkie. And then Eddie came along, "There's a picnic?" "Bill and y/n are going on a picnic today," Stanley explains. "Aww, that's cute," Bev commented. "Why are a-a-all of yo-y-you suddenly on t-t-thi-this channel?" "Curiosity killed the cat, William." Richie grins. "Where are you guys gonna go?" "I'm n-not telling. You gu-g-guys are gonna r-ruin the date." "Aww, Big brother is going on a date with my favorite Loser," Georgie says with excitement in his tone and eyes. "HOLD ON YOU'RE GOING ON A DATE WITH MY TWIN?" Richie yelled as he continues to give me death threats. "I thought I was your favorite Loser, Georgie?" Stanley retorts, offended. "Sorry, Stan the Man," Georgie yelled at Bill's walkie talkie. "I mean, I don't know if it's a d-da-d-date. I asked y/n if she wants to have a picnic, and she said s-s-sure." I stammered flustered cause of the embarrassment. "So, it's not a date?" Ben asks. "I just said, I d-do-don't know." "We should go too, just to make sure Bill doesn't do anything stupid." Beverly chuckles. "You're ki-k-k-kidding, right?" "There's no way I'm letting Bill get time alone with my twin," Richie says sternly.</p><p> </p><p>Well, there goes my chances with y/n. You know there are times when these Losers make life much more like a living hell.</p><p> </p><p>"Y/n just left, your stupid ass better be ready to make my twin happy, Bill." "Bill stole our picnic basket," Mike says. "Oh, he also asked me for outfit tips." Stan chuckles. "Bill went to my house for three days straight, just to study what to do when on a date." Ben continued, embarrassing me. "I'm going now, wish m-m-me luck," I said to break the losers' chain, exposing me on how I prepare for this picnic. "Dad and I taught y/n love all her life. All we ask is for you to continue it." Richie mumbled. "Protective Big Brother side is thriving." "I will, Richie," I reassure him. "Bye Lo-l-losers"</p><p> </p><p>After I bid my goodbye, I look at the mirror, untucked my shirt, grabbed a flannel, and mess up my hair. Oh, look, there's me. I'm nervous and excited at the same time. Nervcited? Excitous? Nervoted? Excivous? How the hell do you explain this feeling? Oh, right, infatuation.</p><p> </p><p>"I'm off, Mom, I'll be h-ho-home by dinner," "Alright take care."</p><p> </p><p>Few more minutes until I arrive. Few more minutes until my "date" with y/n. Few more minutes until I embarrass myself. Few more minutes until I most likely confess. A few more minutes. A few more steps. A few more seconds.</p><p> </p><p>"Oh, hey Bill." y/n greets me.</p><p> </p><p>The moment my eyes met hers, I froze. Y/n's rosy cheeks, the perfect e/c orbs in her eyes. Her hair tied into a low ponytail with baby hair everywhere. She seriously makes a simple outfit so beautiful. I'm captivated.</p><p> </p><p>I probably stared at her for too long cause she started to look uncomfortable. Great going, Bill.</p><p> </p><p>"Hey y/n, sorry I t-took so l-long." "No worries. I found a great spot where we can set up."</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Y/n Tozier</p><p> </p><p>If I'm gonna be honest here, Bill was really late. He said he's gonna be here by 11:25, and he's out here showing up at 11:40. Who would be late on a date? Take note that he was even the one who initiated it. But then again, I overheard Richie talking to Bill, So maybe Richie was just too talkative. But, 25 minutes of waiting? Who wouldn't feel down? I was about to leave and assumed that I was lead on and pranked. But then Bill showed up, lucky shitty boy.</p><p> </p><p>What did I do during those 25 minutes? Well, at first, I waited patiently (for like three and a half minutes). This is shocking cause I'm the most impatient one in the club. Who could blame me? The hardest part when waiting is that you don't know if it's still coming. After that, I wandered around the park, looking for the perfect spot. I just wanna have a definite date with the most good looking person in Derry. I mean picnic. Date? Picnic? Picnic Date, I guess. Then, I went back to the bench and read a book. You guys don't carry around books with you all the time? What a shame. It's perfect for situations like this. No one will feel pity that I'm alone waiting for my date. They'll just think I'm peacefully reading my book.</p><p> </p><p>"Here we are," I announced as I grabbed the blanket in Bill's basket and settled it down. "You w-we-were right, this is the p-perfect spot." "Yeah, It's close to the sun, though. So it kinda hurts my eyes." "Here"</p><p> </p><p>When Bill said, "Here," I thought he was gonna lend me sunglasses. But he just moved in front of the sun with a smile on his face. Kinda dorky but also kinda cute. But the best part of it all? The glow behind him made him look like an angel. The wind was messing his hair more than before, the bright blue sky behind him, the smile he wears that makes me smile even brighter. Ironically, he usually acts like a fallen angel, especially when he's with Richie. But it's the Richie Tozier we're talking about. What'd you expect? Richie not being a bad influence?</p><p> </p><p>But this? This is peaceful—everything I ever wished for.</p><p> </p><p>"Did you make this all by yourself?" I ask, amazed at the way the sandwich tastes. "Wish I could, but M-m-mom helped me." I chuckled "Understandable." "Thanks, Bill. For inviting me to this date."</p><p> </p><p>Saying that was probably a wrong move. But I just wanted Bill to know that this "date," "meetup," "hangout," whatever, means special to me. I mean, I did give an effort and got dolled up for this picnic.</p><p> </p><p>"Sure thing, n/n. I'm glad you s-s-said yes to this date," Bill replied, emphasizing the word date. "Say, What does love feel like for you?" He asks out of the Blue.</p><p> </p><p>I was really taken aback by his subtle question. I don't know what it's like to be in love. But loving sure looked so easy. It's like once you find your person, there's no one else you'd ever want. So here I am praying to the heavens above that Bill, the (fallen) angel, is the one for me.</p><p> </p><p>I sighed. I closed my eyes so I can imagine what I'm gonna reply and said: "Real love has a habit of coming back. No matter how many fights you guys have, no matter how many people dislike the idea of you two being together. You'll go back to the one you love. Maybe when you can be yourself around that person even though you don't know who you really are yet. Every moment seems so precious when it's with him. Of course, the usual butterflies in your stomach, heart racing, the sudden urge to hug him. Well, at least that's what they say in my books. Loving is easy, Don't you think?" </p><p> </p><p>I then opened my eyes and glanced at Bill, not expecting to see him already staring at me. My heart skipped a beat. I never really knew how to deal with sudden eye contact. It didn't really help much that it was Bill who I had eye contact with.</p><p> </p><p>"Yeah, loving does look easy."</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Bill Denbrough</p><p> </p><p>I can never express how happy and relieved I felt when y/n mentioned that this was a date. But what stunned me the most is y/n's revelation on what love felt like for her. She described exactly how I felt for her. </p><p> </p><p>Dear Losers, is this why you guys always talk about how dense we both are? I see it now.</p><p> </p><p>I was broken away from my thoughts when I heard two familiar voices bickering. Then I realized who they are. Of course, it's fucking Richie and Eddie. </p><p> </p><p>"You told them that we were here?" y/n asks. "Promise, I d-di-d-didn't" "Well, Richie didn't really like the thought of me going on a date." "Yeah, No k-kidding, he gave m-m-me death threats this m-mo-morning," I say as the Losers sound nearer and nearer every second.</p><p> </p><p>"How do I become a jellyfish?" "Jellyfishes have no brains. You're pretty close," Ben sassed. "Touché." We hear from afar.</p><p> </p><p>"You think, Aliens will be mad when they find out that we've had the Miss Universe pageant without them for all these years," Richie says to no one at all. "I think the better question is: "Why are you Losers here?" y/n snaps, clearly dejected that they intruded our date." </p><p> </p><p>"Well, we just wanted to take a stroll in the park then bumped into you two," Richie explains. "Yeah, it was just a mere coincidence." Eddie backs him up. "Were we interrupting something?" "Yeah, the date I s-s-s-specifically told you guys n-n-not to go to," I say sternly. "Sorry, Richie couldn't contain himself." "Anyways, do you two got room for six more?" "You Losers won't take no for an answer, won't you?" Bev chuckles, "Little Tozier, knows us all too well." </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>time skip</p><p> </p><p>THIRD PERSON'S POV:</p><p> </p><p>"FUCK, My ass is wet!" Eddie exclaims. Richie didn't let this opportunity to flirt pass and said: "Am I turning you on?" as he smirks. "No, it's the grass," Eddie explains, unknown to most if he's annoyed or flustered. "The grass is turning you on?" Richie stammers. "No! MY ALLERGIES! THE GRASS IS WET!!" "You mean, I'm turning the grass on?" Richie asks, now completely confused about his own stupidity. "FOR FUCKS SAKE, RICHIE. SHUT UP JUST SHUT UP."  "You know if you don't think, then you shouldn't talk at all," Stanley said on behalf of everyone.</p><p> </p><p>The other Losers just stared at them. They all radiated the "Clueless on what to do," "Wants to know what happens next," and, at the same time, "Tired of their stupidity" energy. They all don't know why and how they kept up and survived 7 years of friendship with those two. </p><p> </p><p>"Anyways, how's your pretty little girlfriend, William?" "I don't have one?" "I know, I was just reminding you," Richie said before he winked. Bill sighed before saying, "How's your twin, by the way?" Bill then laughed. Y/n, on the other hand, spitted out a good amount of apple juice, obviously shaken up on what Bill just said. The boy who she liked been told that. Let that sink in. "How much more do you think I'm gonna live?" Bill asks, who stopped laughing now cause of the glares he's receiving from the twins. Ben then started, "nine" "nine what though?" "eight," Mike continued. "seven" "six" "BILL RUN FOR YOUR LIFE" "THANKS FOR T-T-THE ADVICE" "WILLIAM DENBROUGH I HATE YOU WITH EVERY INCH OF MY BODY," Richie yelled. "THAT'S N-NO-NOT SO M-MA-MANY INCHES," Bill exclaims as he starts running. Richie then ran and chased Bill.</p><p> </p><p>This was an unexpected first date, y/n thought. But it sure is unique. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Bet you never expected this for a first date, noh?</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. The Assassin's Lament</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>TW: DEATH AND KILLINGS</p><p>THIRD PERSON'S POV:</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>"Scarlet Slinger, please report to the main office immediately. I repeat, Scarlet Slinger, please report to the main office immediately," A voice said thru the PA.</p><p> </p><p>Who's Scarlet Slinger? It's no other than Y/n L/n. The youngest assassin in the Elite group. No one knows about her past, no one dared to go near her. Y/n never talked to anyone but the Commander and the Medic. She can speak, she just doesn't want to get attached. After all,  Not all assassins survive every mission. There was no academy training nor graduation for Y/n. She was only a child who the Commander brought in and performed tasks extraordinarily well. </p><p> </p><p>As far as everyone knows, she's inhuman. She doesn't have a reason why she's an assassin. She just has that bloodlust that she wants to fulfill. She doesn't have emotions (at least, that's what they think), everyone thought she was one of the government lab's guinea pig, which she isn't. But when she's in a mission, she's a whole different person, she pretends or acts, fooling the prey and then terminating the target with a smug look. Y/n always makes it look like the target died from suicide, and never once has she failed to do so. She gets the job done in less than 36 hours. Who wouldn't hire her? </p><p> </p><p>"Come in, Little one." "Your orders, Sir?" Y/n responds while bowing.  "Someone asked for you."  "What a famous assassin you've become." "Derry, Maine is your next destination. That's out of the state"  "It's nothing new"  "Zack Denbrough is the unfortunate one."  "You'll be leaving tomorrow. Background check of Target 081-172-183, Zack Denbrough, is on your tablet. Understood?" "Yes, Sir. Excuse me." The girl sternly replied before she heads to the door.  "And Y/n?"  "Sir?" "Come back safely, okay?"  "I will, Father." She says nonchalantly. On the other hand, Commander Evan was sheepishly smiling since this was the first time in a while that Y/n called her father. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>☏☏☏</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>"Scarlet Slinger is in position. Target 081-172-183 is located outside the balcony, drinking coffee. How many seconds before the mission?"  "Fifteen seconds." The Commander confirms.  "Permission to fire, Sir." Scarlet slinger said.  "five"  a voice thru her earpiece counted down.  "four"  "three"  She smirks bloodlust taking over.  "two"  "Hey Dad dinner is r-ready," Bill Denbrough approached his father.  "one."  Scarlet pulled the trigger, immediately taking off her gear to check if her work is done. </p><p> </p><p>"Did you hear th-t-that gunshot?" Bill asks. He and Zack Denbrough's voices were barely audible as seconds pass.</p><p> </p><p>And to her dismay, she failed. "Report." "This is Scarlet Slinger, failed."  Y/n says with a scowl.  "Get ready for school tomorrow. Food and clothes are at the inn. No assassination tomorrow until further notice. Understood?" "Yes, Commander." "Goodnight, y/n. Sweet dreams"  She then sighed and switched off all modes of communication in her gear. This was the first time she failed as a sniper in a mission. Seems to it that y/n can't assassinate someone when they're in their own home. Stupid Bill, delaying my work, y/n thought.</p><p> </p><p>Y/n silently went down the massive tree, feeling gloomier and gloomier as she thought of her failed attempt. It seems childish, but she killed higher ranked people than Zack Denbrough in less than 36 hours. Then here she is getting an order to stand by until further notice. She knows that there are firsts to everything, but she just can't convince herself that she couldn't terminate an electrician. </p><p> </p><p>☏☏☏</p><p> </p><p>The (H/c) haired girl didn't get much of a goodnight sleep. Other than the creaky and firm bed, she hated that she would have to attend school in a few hours. It's not like y/n was uneducated, she was quite the intelligent type for a 14-year-old girl. Her acting skills will then again be put to the test as she attends Derry High School. </p><p> </p><p>After half an hour of trying to sleep, y/n decided to review Zack Denbrough's profile. Nothing was out of the ordinary. Just his height, age, work, achievements, family relations, heck there were even calls and messages that connect to him committing crucial acts. But all that won't matter, he's gonna commit 'suicide' anyways once the scarlet slinger gets her orders. There was something that she thought of most, though. William (Bill) Denbrough, Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak, Stanley Uris, Beverly Marsh, Mike Hanlon, Ben Hanscom. She saw this group of kids the last time she was in Derry. But The hell does these teenagers have to do with Zack Denbrough's assassination. 'Maybe they're next,' y/n thought. She doesn't mind adding more targets, it isn't the first time she'll get her hands dirty anyway. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>☏☏☏</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>"I'm Y/n L/n, 14 years old, and I love to play the piano."  Y/n was currently in front of her homeroom, introducing herself. She's a reserved cold-hearted person, but right now, she's wearing the brightest smile wearing pastel colors. She looked stunning, and everyone was fascinated. That was how she created the most beautiful lie in Derry. 'fitting in won't be a problem after all. I got every single student wrapped around my finger.' Y/n thought despite wearing a kind-hearted facade.  "It's been half a year Ms. L/n I can you catch up."  "Of course,"   Y/n replied as she sat down on her seat. 'Bill Denbrough, Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak, are in this classroom. Interesting.' She thought. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>☏☏☏</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Classes were finally over. Y/n can finally remove her smile that she's been wearing every day, it hurts her cheeks. She did receive a lot of compliments, though, which is surprising cause people in Derry usually act like spoiled brats. Y/n did keep in mind that maybe they're just nice cause they want her to teach them or gain popularity. But the students in Derry aren't the only one who's putting up an act. </p><p> </p><p>Y/n jumped unto her bed, sighing, and extremely tired. Y/n barely got any sleep last night. Y/n sighed for the fifth time this afternoon as she thought of calling her father. She wanted to have a chat, not as a commander but as a father.  Being in an old inn in Derry gets lonely, you know? The fact that she's fourteen and living alone while feeling troubled by the failed attempt, y/n obviously needed company. She won't admit it, but she needs someone to talk to. Y/n doesn't want to bother her father, but he'll make adjustments if it's her right? </p><p> </p><p>After a few minutes of contemplating, staring at the radio, waiting for the Commander to call first, she decided to drown her pride and chose a channel. But then she heard the Commander's voice,  "Scarlet Slinger, are you there." She was ecstatic to finally hear his voice after drowning in a sea of self-pity, but she'll never show that. "Yes, Sir." "I have a job for you." "Right beside the town Derry, the top hacker is trying to hack our system." "I'll be on my way, Sir." "Take care, Scarlet Slinger."  </p><p> </p><p>Y/n then immediately got ready, clearing the thought of the Commander abandoning her. She wore her red contacts, removed her hair tie, letting the wind take control of her hair, and wore her black bucket hat. For someone living in the '90s, it's quite unbelievable that someone can hack such an extensive system, especially the ministry of defense. But what bothers her the most is how this hacker got its' gadgets and knowledge. Well, it's not like it would matter anyway. Y/n could quickly finish off the hacker. It's a hacker, not a close-range shooter. </p><p> </p><p>She stealthily jumped out her window and was about to run for it. But then she heard the consigliere thru her earpiece;  "There's a limo waiting for you by your window." "Wouldn't it be too eye-catching." "Your father insisted."  "Good luck Scarlet." With that final order, Y/n heard a honk and saw the limo. 'So much for not standing out," she thought.</p><p> </p><p>"Good evening, Ms. L/n." "Let's go,"  Y/n sternly said, not really wanting to start a conversation with her uncle. They went to the hacker's home really quietly that they could hear their own breathing. When they finally arrive, the driver looked back to where Scarlet was seated only to see her missing. She wasn't really missing. She just wanted to finish this right away.  "Stubborn Warrior,"  Scarlet's uncle chuckles. </p><p> </p><p>Meanwhile, Y/n was loading her gun and checked if she had the second gun ready. When she was sure that she was ready, she walked inside the hacker's home through the window and saw a hallway that leads to a room. The room was obviously where the hacker was located. It showed so much computer light from the bottom of the door and heard intense typing.  "Target is Located. Permission to forward, Sir."  Scarlet updated the Commander.  "Hold." </p><p> </p><p>The ministry of defense is well known in the underground business, assassinating criminals 24/7. It was every hacker's dream to get into their system and review their data. Most importantly, hackers want to know data about their workers, for obvious reasons that they would know who not to get associated with. Assassins are remarkable actors, after all. The hacker that Scarlet was currently cornering, finally got into their system. Utterly oblivious to the fact that this was a trap. The hacker got a good look at the information that was shown on his screen.</p><p> </p><p>Name: L/n, Evan</p><p>Birthday: December 03, 1951</p><p>Origin: Japan</p><p>Position: Commander</p><p>Assassination Count: 108</p><p>--He's Intelligent, a Perfectionist, Former Sniper, and a Father.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Name:  Leblanc, Irina</p><p>Birthday: January 01, 1956</p><p>Origin: Netherlands</p><p>Position: Consigliere</p><p>Assassination Count: 24</p><p>--She's in Incharge of strategic Information. Loyal to the ministry and competitive. The brain of the department.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Name: L/n, Kenny</p><p>Birthday: July 16, 1953</p><p>Origin: Japan</p><p>Position: Bomber/Medic</p><p>Assassination Count: 58</p><p>--He's a Former Hacker, and the Toughest member of the ministry. Money holder that never gets tricked. The Commander's younger brother.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Name: Ln, Yn</p><p>Birthday: (Your birth month and birth date), 1972</p><p>Origin: Japan</p><p>Position: Sniper/ Hacker/ Assassin</p><p>Assassination Count: 101 (soon to be 102)</p><p>--She's the Youngest in the elite group, The most famous hacker, Next in line when the Commander retires, The Commander's only child.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>'What do they mean by soon to be 102,' The hacker thought. The hacker then checked their list of targets, shocked to see his name on the top of the list with a label: Terminating at 00:00:08 Countdown. The image in his screen soon morphed into a model of Kenny.  "Look Behind."  He stated before turning the image back to its' standard home screen. "Behind?" The hacker trembled. "I'm right here, Sensei. Hope you know what the consequences are" The hacker saw Scarlet on his right side. Intimidating bloodlust filled eyes with a white gun pointed directly at his head. "Sayōnara, Maehara-Sensei.(Goodbye, teacher)" Scarlet said before smirking and pulling the trigger. Maehara didn't have enough time to dodge Scarlet's attack, nor was he able to bid his farewell to his disciple. Scarlet wore her gloves and placed her second gun on Maehara's Hand. She then glanced at his screen and saw the system Self-destructing. "Thanks for making me a successful hacker, Sensei," Scarlet stated as she looks back at her teacher, a tint of both gloom and excitement in her eyes.  "Scarlet Slinger, Report." "Success" "Good job, Scarlet. Sleep well, don't skip school tomorrow." "Goodnight, Father." </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>☏☏☏</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Y/n was daydreaming the whole time she was in class. She looked out the window taking in the sights this town could offer. It's quiet here in Derry. But there was this thing in Derry last year that feeds off the citizens. Of course, the ministry knew about this, Y/n and Kenny were assigned to this mission. Y/n and Kenny watched as the Brats fought the clown. Y/n was about to step in, getting slightly annoyed at the Commander for not giving them orders yet. But then the Losers defeated the clown, on their own, without dying. The two assassins were about to take their leave when the Losers took notice that they were there. "What's that? Is that a vampire?" A loser asked, trembling. Y/n and Kenny looked back at the group with an intimidating expression. Y/n and Kenny were both wearing red contacts that made them look like vampires. "Sayōnara,"  Kenny said before yanking Y/n outside the sewer. "What the hell does Sayōnara mean?" </p><p> </p><p>Y/n's vivid flashback of the memory was interrupted when she noticed that someone was staring at her, Bill Denbrough. 'Just a little peek,' he thought. As Bill took a quick glance, he saw Y/n looking his way, with a smirk on her face. Bill couldn't stop looking at her out of curiosity, perhaps? But Y/n wasn't done teasing. She thought about how fun it would be if she broke the honor student. So Y/n winked at Bill. Then on cue, the bell rang the fourth time today. So Y/n walked out the door as if nothing happened. Bill, On the other hand, was a blushing mess.  "Holy Shit, Bill beat me to it,"  Richie said in disbelief. "You saw that too?" Eddie asks Richie while glancing at the blushing honor student. </p><p> </p><p>The three Losers then rushed outside to follow their new classmate. Desperate to have a chat with her. Soon enough, all the other Losers joined their way to the bike stand. To the Losers' joy, they saw y/n sitting on her bike playing with her DS. "Hey gorgeous,"  Richie said to y/n while placing his arm around her waist. But as soon as Richie did that; She did an elbow punch on his face. Richie stumbled backward, nose bleeding. "What did you just" "I did an elbow punch on you. Simple as that,"  she cuts him off before turning her attention to the game.  "Yeah, I think you broke his nose,"  Eddie exclaimed. "It's not broken, it's just bleeding." She answered as she made her way to Richie. "I'll make it up to you." Lie Count: 002 "Say, Y/n, Do you want to walk home with us?"  "I stay at an inn,"  y/n said as she scratches behind her neck.  "We should have a sleepover at Bill's house."  "You're s-sa-saying that like it's yo-y-your house,"  an annoyed Bill said.  "But, that does s-s-sound like a good i-idea."  "It would be just like before,"  Stan said with a smile.  "Give Mike a call, tell him to m-meet us at my h-hou-house by 4:30."  "Can one of you pick me up at the inn? I don't know where Bill's house is." Lie Count: 003</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>☏☏☏</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Y/n was now inside her target's house for a sleepover, not an assassination. Beverly was sweet enough to pick her up. Though, Y/n did have a hard time hiding all her guns and knives. The Losers were currently munching on the treats Sharon prepared, but Y/n was just staring at the piano in the middle of their living room.  "Y/n, you know h-how to play the piano, right?"  Bill asks, taking notice of y/n staring at the piano. "Yeah, just a little bit." Lie Count: 004. Y/n learned to play the piano at a very young age due to it being a great weapon when acting and assassinating. "Why don't you play us a song, Dear?"  Sharon asked, interested that Bill made a friend who is a pianist. With this being said, Y/n scurried off her seat and made her way to the large piano. She then sighed before she played the calming intro of Chopin's: Winter Wind. But what the Losers didn't expect is that it would have a ton of jump scares, it was not calming at all.  "You know for a girl who gives elbow punches she's very delicate when playing the piano,"  Richie said with wide eyes. Everyone was obviously captivated. "Are you sure that's the same piano? Why does it feel more lively and colorful?"  Stan rhetorically asked.  "It's nice to have another pianist in the house. You should marry her, Bill."  Sharon said nonchalantly. Bill was flustered by his Mom's statement, not knowing how to reply. Chopin's Winter Wind piece took about 4 minutes before y/n went back to her seat and looked down as she was attacked by compliments. Y/n blushed and genuinely smiled by their praises. The first wall is broken, a hundred thousand more to go. </p><p> </p><p>"Y/n could end my life anytime, and I'd thank her," Richie said to no one at all, while admiring y/n's features.  "We'd thank her too," Stanley replied.  "You got to be more careful. Laying out your life like that,"  y/n commented while looking at Richie with an intimidating look. "Wait, you look just like that vampire we saw in the sewer!"  Richie exclaimed.  "Pardon?"  "You guys remember, right? After we defeated IT, we saw two vampires."  "The one who y-yelled that un-unknown word?"  "Oh yeah, you guys do have the same intimidating look."  "You're obsessed, just let it go."  Y/n played it off, trying her best not to break her cover.  "You're dead to me if that was really you. Those two scared us thinking IT has minions,"  Bev chuckles. 'Why isn't she curious about us saying IT all the time,' Bill thought. </p><p> </p><p>"Do you gu-guys want to p-play with the fa-family computer?" Bill suggested as most of his friends were getting bored.  "Sure, I can't wait to beat y/n with my skills in Super Mario." "Oh yeah? Come at me as if you're gonna kill me,"  y/n chuckled.  "You're on, L/n."  A few minutes later, Y/n was announced as the winner. She won by a landslide, Richie sucked and just kept on flirting while playing that's why he lost. If Y/n was honest, this was one of the rare times that she was genuinely happy. Y/n didn't really mind becoming a Loser. But there was one thing she forgot; the assassination. There's no escaping from this cruel reality. Y/n is an assassin, and she must forget every connection she had during the mission. </p><p> </p><p>By the time they finished dinner, they were sent to sleep by Sharon. But y/n's mind wouldn't agree, her mind was full of thoughts, she was overthinking. Soon Enough, she shot up and decided to sit by Bill's window. Y/n looked out with cold eyes, and she didn't even bother putting on her facade. She has so much on her plate: school, new missions, and the blood of people she has killed. Y/n flinched when she felt a hand was placed on her shoulder. It was Bill, he was obviously half asleep, yet she could see the concern in his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>"Feeling blue?" Bill asked.  "You could say that,"  Y/n shrugs.  "What's on y-y-yo-your mind?"  Y/n couldn't tell Bill she was an assassin, that's just stupid.  "You don't really have to say it to me. I don't pretend to know what you're facing, either. But I just wanted to remind you that you're one of us now. We're friends, and friends c-ca-care for each other."  He rested his hand on Y/n's left cheek before he continued:  "I don't want to see you gloomy either."  Her heart skipped a beat, But this time was different, her heart rate sped up because of love. It's funny how Y/n despised Bill when he delayed the assassination before. Now here she was, feeling warm inside when Bill is near. Y/n placed her hand on top of Bill's and gave him a weak smile. Bill knew what to say when Y/n was freaking out. He was exactly what she needed, a reset point. <br/>Y/n thought he was perfect. But are they really perfect if one of them was lying? </p><p> </p><p>----------</p><p> </p><p>The rays of sunshine through the windowpane pulled y/n out of her slumber. She looked around in weary haste but soon calmed down once memories from last night resurfaced. The said girl had a sleepover, a fun one might I add, at her target's abode. 'This isn't a big deal,' she thought. Lie Count: 005.</p><p> </p><p>She flinched at the sight of the other Losers sluggishly eating their breakfast. The h/c haired girl shouldn't break down her masquerade just yet. "Goodmorning," Y/n greeted in a cheery tone. Georgie hurriedly went up to y/n and embraced her, earning a small smile and a head pat from the girl. They all gladly returned her greeting and told her to join them. She complied and sat on the stool beside Bill. She stole several glances at her target: Zack Denbrough, wanting to extract more information that would be useful in the next attempts. "You wake up so late, and you're a morning person. How is that even possible?" Ben chuckled. "Well," Y/n replied, not entirely sure how to answer that. Lie Count: 006 If anyone in the bunch is cheerful, it's evident that Y/n isn't it.  </p><p> </p><p>"Alright, I'm off for work," Zack said, tearing away his eyes from the daily newspaper and quickly got ready to leave. </p><p> </p><p>"Where are you working today?" His wife unknowingly voiced out the assassin's thoughts. Y/n's e/c eyes glimmered, unnoticed to the rest. </p><p> </p><p>"The main office in the morning and then at the barrens by four pm," Zack replied without batting an eye to his family. </p><p> </p><p>"Take care, Dad," Bill said before hugging Zack. Y/n internally chuckled, take care indeed, Zack Denbrough. </p><p> </p><p>Zack lousily finished putting on his tie and left the house without another goodbye. He should've given his family a darling goodbye. Who knows? Today might be the last time he'll ever step in his lodging. Sharon gave the group a bittersweet smile. It's not out of the ordinary for her to feel uncertain and gloomy. A husband who's always working, caring about the family less every day, keeps a ton of secrets, who would want that? </p><p> </p><p>The sound of silverware utensils and glasses filled with milk clashing filled the uneasy air around them. Neither of them knew what to say nor feel after that perplex family moment. Y/n scanned the room, taking in every bit of information she can muster to use in an assassination attempt. Her e/c eyes then landed on a peculiar half-empty cup of coffee. She clutched the poison in the pocket of her pastel f/c hoodie, calculating every move she should take. </p><p> </p><p>"Do you guys have any coffee?" Y/n broke the silence.</p><p> </p><p>"Yeah, there's a container near the sink. I think it's still full cause Zack is the only one who drinks coffee. Feel free to get a cup," Sharon replied, making Y/n smirk. Bingo, the said girl, thought. The other Losers paid no attention to her troubling smirk, thinking that maybe Y/n is just one of those people severely addicted to coffee. Y/n muttered thanks and then smiled at Bill. </p><p> </p><p>Y/n then made her way to the not so foreign kitchen. The kitchen was a bit of a stretch from the table, fortunate for Y/n and unfortunate to Zack and his dear family. Y/n slipped on her black gloves and opened the coffee container carefully. It wasn't the same brand of coffee that she enjoyed, but for the mission, it will do. Y/n grabbed a coffee mug and prepared her well-earned coffee. She grabbed the tiny bottle of powdered poison and cautiously contaminated the coffee with the poison. This was actually the first time that she was using poison in an assassination attempt. She removed the label from the bottle afterward. She replaced it with a similar-looking medicine label, the target intakes nightly. As a routine, she grabbed her small kit from her pockets and removed every evidence in the coffee container and the poison. Then, she lifted her gloves and sighed. Lastly, Y/n mixed her coffee as if nothing happened. </p><p> </p><p>Bill's faint footsteps soon replaced the echo of the teaspoon clanking the mug. Bill made his way to the kitchen, wanting some alone time with Y/n to talk about something that happened the day before. He saw Y/n with her back facing him focused on her cup of coffee. </p><p> </p><p>"Are you afraid of me?" Bill asked the girl a few feet away from her.</p><p>"Why should I?" Y/n replied without turning back and facing him.</p><p>"Are you afraid of me being afraid of you?"</p><p> </p><p>Bill did the unpredictable and hugged her from behind. Y/n barely flinched, it's like she knew he would do that sooner or later.</p><p> </p><p>She didn't understand his last question. Although it was just natural to ask, she couldn't. She thought that it would just leave a bittersweet taste on her mouth. And so both of their questions remained unanswered.</p><p> </p><p>She forced a smile at Bill before messing his hair. Soon enough, memories from last night reappeared in Y/n's mind for the second time this morning. </p><p> </p><p>"You don't have to tell me. I don't pretend to know what you're facing, either. But I just wanted to remind you that you're one of us now. We're friends, and friends care for each other." He rested his hand on Y/n's left cheek before he continued: "I don't want to see you gloomy either." Y/n placed her hand on top of Bill's and gave him a weak smile. </p><p>Y/n unconsciously started leaning in. Bill did the same, and he wanted this more than anything. Their noses were touching as they felt each other's breath creep on their lips and neck. Y/n initiated the kiss and gained dominance the moment her lips were against his. Their lips were in sync as if this wasn't the first time they have kissed. </p><p>Bill's approach was slow and sweet, while Y/n's kiss was rough and needy. They both enjoyed it nonetheless. Well, at least that's what Y/n said to Bill. Bill separated to catch his breath while Y/n just stared at him blankly. "That was my first kiss," He said. But before he could even reply, Y/n pushed him down the couch, laying on top of him continuing the now heated kiss. </p><p>Bill's heart was pounding so loud that Y/n could hear it. He recovered from his shock and kissed back, snaking his arm around her waist. Y/n's heart was racing too, but she wasn't doing this cause she liked Bill, she was doing this for her entertainment. Lie Count: 007. And although Bill wanted this moment to last longer, he knew that this had to stop. He pushed her away softly and tried to find the right words to explain. </p><p>"Don't," Y/n warned. "You don't have to say anything. Goodnight, Bill, sleep well," she continued before embracing him.</p><p>Even killers needed something to reassure them at night.</p><p> </p><p>Y/n fixated her eyes on her coffee, currently rethinking her choices and actions. She didn't even realize how hard her grip was from her mug before Bill called her name. "Although last night was a bit absurd. I did quite enjoy it," he broke the silence, his arms still around Y/n's waist. "I enjoyed it too." "I wouldn't mind kissing you again," she teased. Lie Count: 008. Bill buried his flustered face in Y/n's neck. While he was enjoying, he failed to notice the smug smirk planted on her face and her e/c eyes full of mischief. </p><p> </p><p>By the time this is over, he'll break apart, the assassin thought.  </p><p> </p><p>☠︎︎☠︎︎☠︎︎</p><p> </p><p>The Losers are currently in Bill's Living room having their own little worlds. Ben, Mike, Georgie, Eddie, and Beverly were playing a board game. Beverly won many rounds, outsmarting most of them. Richie was trying his best to beat Y/n's high score in her DS that he basically stole from her(he was failing to beat her, btw). Bill and Stanley were playing circus in the Denbrough's family computer. Lastly, Y/n played several classical pieces in the piano, satisfying the group in the living room. </p><p> </p><p>"Do you ever just want to gently place your hand on someone's cheeks," Beverly started out of the blue.</p><p> </p><p>"Hold their free hand and enjoy the warmth," Mike continued being in the same trance.</p><p>"Look at the stars while the other is silently appreciating the sight of you being happy," Ben fantasized. </p><p>"Stare at their eyes after looking at the stars, seeing a whole entire universe in their orbs," Stanley continued with a smile. </p><p>"Getting lost in their eyes and put your arm over their shoulders," Eddie imagined.</p><p>"Then violently jerk their head on a right angle and snap their neck," Y/n finished with an innocent smile. They all gave her a confused glance, all except for one. Georgie had his eyes close, and ears covered the moment Beverly started saying something sappy. "I was joking," Y/n shrugged. Lie Count: 009</p><p>"Well, that took an unexpected turn," Bill said.</p><p>"So did their neck," Richie said with a serious face. The Losers (except Y/n) stopped what they were doing, earning a small silence before breaking into fits of laughter. Y/n felt her mouth twitch, almost smiling. She soon let it go and went back to her straight-laced face and played more classical music. </p><p> </p><p>☠︎︎☠︎︎☠︎︎</p><p> </p><p>It was about 2:00 when Y/n went to go to the bathroom. She slightly chuckled at the house's interior cause it just made it easier to complete Scarlet's mission. The bathroom was right beside Zack's office, and far away from the living room, there was nothing that will get in her way. She'll finally get to go home and see her dad after three days. This was quite the stretch of Scarlet's time during the mission since she usually finishes the work in about one and a half days.</p><p> </p><p>She once again wore her black gloves and turned the doorknob. The girl was greeted by a packed office, his table was filled with unfinished reports, files, you name it. She cut her observing short and opened the drawer where she thinks that the target keeps his medicines. Just as she imagined his pills were in the drawer, she swiftly got it out and compared the poison with the real pills. They both have the same shade of blue, and the same layout, just like Y/n had designed. The only difference between the two is what's written in the bottle, and with small text, Zack could never tell the difference. Y/n closed the drawer and left the poison sitting in the table. </p><p> </p><p>Once she was done, she immediately but stealthily got out of Zack's office. She was about to go to the bathroom when she heard a small voice from her side. "Why were you inside Dad's office, Y/n?" She slowly turned to where the sound was from, only to be met by the small and innocent Georgie. "Sorry, I mistook it from the bathroom. Bill didn't really say which door the bathroom is," Y/n replied, pointing at the two identical doors. Lie Count: 010. Georgie understood and continued his way to his room. Y/n let out a breath that she didn't know she was holding before going inside the bathroom for real this time. </p><p> </p><p>She stared at her reflection from the mirror. She was beautiful, to say the least, but beneath her beauty hides a terrifying demon. Y/n balled her fists, she wasn't supposed to get attached. She doesn't deserve to know what friendship was like, Lie Count: 011. She killed more people than she ever made friends, she doesn't deserve to get a happy and quiet life in Derry, Lie Count: 012. She shouldn't have gotten their hopes up.</p><p> </p><p>No, I'm doing this cause some targets will do something that can hurt many people. I'm doing this for the world's good. I'm not doing anything wrong, She thought. Lie Count: 013.</p><p> </p><p>She was an assassin, for crying out loud. Y/n has killed a hundred people, and nothing will ever change that nor remove that from her conscience. Of course, killing is a sin, even if you shoot for the right cause.</p><p> </p><p>We're just sinners pretending to be heroes.</p><p>We're not heroes. There were so many times that I wish we were, but we're not. </p><p> </p><p>This was by far the toughest battle the assassin has ever face. Y/n was fighting between what she feels and what she knows. She feels happy that she had a group of friends right now. But she knows that it's unhealthy for assassin's to have friends. </p><p> </p><p>I'll be leaving soon. Should I be selfless and tell the Losers the truth before I go? Or should I be selfish and forget the friendship once I leave? </p><p> </p><p>Whatever she chooses, she knows that they both will get hurt. But what can she do? Welcome to the overly cruel world, where the good shall be separated from the bad. Y/n shook her head and splashed water in her face to calm herself down. Once she did, she exhaled and went back to the bunch.</p><p> </p><p>"You sure took your time," Richie said.</p><p>"Yeah, aren't you disgusted by the many germs that linger in the bathrooms? Most especially when it isn't even your own comfort room," Eddie gagged in disgust just by imagining it.</p><p>"A girl gotta do what she's got to do," Y/n simply replied. Beverly smiled and gave the girl a fist bump. </p><p> </p><p>Y/n knew that this was the last time she was gonna see them ever again. It's sad how this was her first and last sleepover with them. Maybe they'll be great friends in another life. But in this one, Y/n suddenly leaving them was bound to happen whether they liked it or not.</p><p> </p><p>"I love you guys," Y/n said straight from the heart. She gave them a hug one by one, thanking them for inviting her. </p><p> </p><p>☠︎︎☠︎︎☠︎︎</p><p> </p><p>When it was time to go, Y/n felt like crying, she never felt this much pain in finishing a mission. She wished she never felt that way ever again, cause that would kill her slowly but surely. </p><p> </p><p>Y/n and Bill were the last ones left, they both had something they wanted to say anyway. They both stared at each other's eyes, finding the right words to tell the other. For Bill, he didn't understand why Y/n looked so blue and anxious. </p><p> </p><p>We're going to see each other next Monday again. So why was she sad? The boy thought. </p><p> </p><p>He doesn't know that this is goodbye.</p><p> </p><p>"Thanks for inviting me, and," she paused. "I love you with all my heart," She continued before giving Bill her million-dollar smile.</p><p>"I love you too."</p><p> </p><p>She connected their lips one last time before she leaves forever. Tears were forming in her eyes as she kissed Bill slowly with all the love her heart has kept inside. Bill felt like she was saying a tearjerking farewell, and he didn't understand why. She separated their lips as she felt warm tears sprinkling down her cheeks. She smiled at Bill for the last time until a long time. "Goodbye, Bill, See you on Monday," Y/n waved at him going down the steps and walked to the sidewalk before he can even reply. Lie Count: 014. </p><p> </p><p>Bill touched his lips out of shock. He was supposed to be a blushing mess cause of the kiss, so why were tears falling from his eyes? He brushed off the feeling of sadness, wiped his few tears, and went inside their home. Bill went to the piano, immensely missing the girl who played the piano most of her stay. His eyes fell on a particular white and f/c handmade bracelet, he picked it up and realized that it was Y/n's bracelet. The brunette wore it and thought of giving it back on Monday rather than going to the inn she currently stays at. Tears were released from his eyes every time he looked at the bracelet, still not knowing why. But soon enough, he arrived at his room and cried himself to sleep.</p><p> </p><p>Why am I crying? </p><p>I'm sorry, I really am.</p><p> </p><p>☠︎︎☠︎︎☠︎︎</p><p> </p><p>It was currently 4:48, and Scarlet was on her way to the Barrens with her uncle: Kenny, and Dad's right-hand woman: Irina. The Losers went home by 2:45, so Y/n got the sleep she needed cause of all the crying. Facing the two big babies that would accompany her to the barrens didn't really make her case any better.</p><p> </p><p>"Shut your mouth," Kenny yelled while rubbing the temples of his forehead.</p><p>"You shut your mouth," Irina argued in the same tone and volume. </p><p>"They're still fighting?" Commander L/n asked his daughter through her earpiece</p><p>"Ever since they saw each other." Y/n replied, clearly suffering cause she was the one to witness their hell of an argument.</p><p>"I'm surprised no one has shot fire yet," Scarlet joked. </p><p>"I'll shoot your mouth, you want that?" Kenny replied while his gun was pointed at Irina's mouth.</p><p>"Whoops, spoke too soon," Y/n told the Commander. The Commander sighed before reminding her that all of the assassins should get back to the office safely. </p><p>"Kiss it instead, motherfucker," Irina countered, not showing any fear even if there was a gun pointed at her. There was an awkward silence radiating from the two, and that's the most peaceful moment Y/n has ever felt since they started the trip to the barrens. </p><p>"That's flirting???" The Commander asked Scarlet clearly confused from the exchange. "How?" Y/n replied.</p><p> </p><p>Scarlet checked the time and saw that it was already 4:56, and she panicked cause Zack could have already left. She then started running between the two so-called adults pulling them by their wrists on the way to the Barrens. "Thanks to you guys, The target could have already left," Sarcasm dripping from Scarlet's every word. </p><p> </p><p>When they arrived at the Barrens, it was already empty. No electricians nor business partners were seen. It was just the three of them. Y/n loaded her two guns and pointed it at Irina and Kenny. "I wanted this mission to get finished sooner," Lie Count: 015 "And you guys just had to ruin it by your bickering, why won't you guys just make out already," Scarlet continued with a scowl. "I swear that the both of you won't step into headquarters ever again," She threatened. </p><p> </p><p>"All assassins should get back to headquarters safe and sound," The Commander reminded Y/n through her earpiece. "She won't kill you, stop trembling," Commander reprimanded both Kenny and Irina through their piece. Scarlet sighed, not lowering her guns, "Confess right now or shoot your legs. I'll be sure to cut off a nerve so you guys can't walk anymore," she growled. "And may I remind you that I've memorized every nerve in the human body," she continued.</p><p> </p><p>"I've liked you from the very start, Kenny," Irina admitted. </p><p>"I only teased you of your height cause I wanted a reason to be near you all the time," Kenny confessed. </p><p> </p><p>Y/n sighed and lowered her guns, never wanting to play matchmaking ever again. </p><p> </p><p>☠︎︎☠︎︎☠︎︎</p><p> </p><p>"I'm home," Zack exclaimed from the doorway. Y/n's plan was staring. </p><p> </p><p>Zack removed his tie and went straight to his office without taking a second to glance at his family. "Hey Bill, can you make me some coffee again? I'll be on the balcony," he said in which Bill quickly complied.</p><p> </p><p>Y/n sat on the same tree that she executed her first attempt. She had a full view of the inside and outside of the house. She grabbed her binoculars and watched as her plan goes into play. </p><p> </p><p>Zack went inside his office, leaving the door open, placed his suitcase on his chair, and started to go through the documents about tomorrow's events. If the ministry of defense's intel was correct, they would implement their heist tomorrow. Zack finished reviewing the plan and decided to unclutter his table. He placed every document to its' proper place orderly, and he placed back the bottle of his so-called pills back in his drawer. He didn't notice the poison, and he didn't even consider why his pills were out in the open. Y/n then smirked, knowing that the mission is done.</p><p> </p><p>Y/n's plan was going exactly as planned so far. Zack asked for coffee, and his coffee is contaminated. He was going to be in the balcony, it's the most common place to commit suicide. He held the bottle of poison, so now it has his fingerprints on it. And with his prints on it, the police would conclude it as a suicide and not murder by methods of poisoning. They would think that its poisoning was intentional cause the victim will have a bottle of poison inside his only drawer with his prints on it. And suppose ever Bill was accused of the poisoning. In that case, they could just point out that he didn't have any fingerprints in the poison bottle or the doorknob (Zack never let his kids go inside his office without consent). This was Y/n's well-thought and foolproof plan. </p><p> </p><p>Zack proceeded to go out to the balcony to finally get the rest and fresh air he needed. Y/n then saw Bill going inside his dad's office with a smile on his face. He gave Zack the lethal coffee. Oh, how surprising this will be. Zack sipped his coffee while having small talk with his eldest child. Scarlet wished she could warn them that this was the last time they'll talk to each other face to face, but that would just delay her work even more.</p><p> </p><p>Y/n's smirk was replaced with a frown as she realized that this was the last time that she'll ever see Bill too. </p><p> </p><p>It's their fate, there will always be a wall separating them. </p><p> </p><p>A tear rolled down Y/n's cheek for the second time this day as she stared at her love's retreating figure. She knew the love they had won't last forever, but did she ever wish it would? Yes, she did, and there was no denying that.</p><p> </p><p>Y/n watched Zack finish his coffee, seeing that he's getting dizzy and would die anytime soon. She couldn't see clearly too, her tears that she didn't know existed were rolling down her cheeks nonstop. She saw Zack collapsed, meaning her mission and plan ended in success. </p><p> </p><p>"Scarlet Slinger, Report." "Sucess" Before the Commander could even reply, she turned off her communicator and folded her legs. She hugged herself as she cried because there was no one else there to hug and comfort her.</p><p> </p><p>She cried and cried, not even trying to calm herself down nor care about the sleeping people in the neighborhood. She went down the tree retreating to headquarters with a frown. This was the first time that she'll go back from a mission without a smug smirk and a satisfied heart.</p><p> </p><p>The pain, the loneliness, the anger, the sacrifices, the guilt, Y/n endured it all.</p><p> </p><p>I wish we never met. Lie Count: 016</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>This is The Assassin's Lament.</p>
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<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Fluff Alphabet</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Activities - Cuddles or fooling around in the quarry. Bill would probably make you sit in front of him for a whole hour to sketch your figure.</p><p>Beauty - How your orbs shine whenever the sun's glow hit it perfectly. How your hair sways in sync with the wind.</p><p>Comfort - hugs and forehead kisses, he'll stop stuttering cause he's determined to calm you down.</p><p>Dreams - You'll always have the main role in his books' movie adaptions.</p><p>Equal - dominant</p><p>Fight - Bill loves you too much so he never wants to fight with you nor let you sleep while you're still feeling blue.</p><p>Gratitude - He always remind you that you're beautiful and that he cares for you. He's fully aware of all the things you have done for him, so he makes sure to do something in return wether you like it or not.</p><p>Honesty - He never shows that he's sad cause he doesn't want you to feel blue too. Although, you told him several times that he's not a burden, he still refuses and just give you a not so genuine smile.</p><p>Inspiration - Both of you changed in a good way. The Losers told you that both of you smile more often ever since you started dating. Bill also got inspired to make a book that's based on your relationship.</p><p>Jealousy - YES, but he never shows it. Bill gives you and Stanley weird glances whenever he thinks the both of you are too close for comfort (but you and Stan's distance is just right for friends). He won't confront you about it, but whenever you guys are alone, he'll give a lot of indirect signs that he's jealous. </p><p>Kiss - Good kisser. His kisses are always sweet and innocent. FOREHEAD KISSES 24/7.</p><p>Love Confession - He'll give you his finished book and whenever a chapter ends he puts a sticky note and writes a compliment. And at the end of the book; "I like you so much, please let me court you," was written on the last sticky note.</p><p>Marriage - of course he wants to marry you. He'll probably propose in a beach with beautiful sceneries.</p><p>Nicknames - Love or Darling</p><p>On Cloud Nine - He would always space out when he's in love, probably daydreaming. YES it becomes too obvious. He was just too in love with you.</p><p>PDA - He's not comfortable with too much PDA. It's not because he doesn't want to show you off, but he's lowkey scared that you'll get bullied by Bowers too.</p><p>Quirk - He can easily read anyone like an open book, especially you. Bill will know whenever you're troubled, anxious, blue. No matter how hard you hide it from him, he still figures it out. Which is nice cause he never fails to calm you down.</p><p>Romance - Very romantic, a loveable gentleman. He's both cliché and creative.</p><p>Support - He always give you his full support. Although, he does sometimes add his small comments about your decisions. He's your safe haven, whenever you feel like the world is placed on your shoulders, he'll comfort you and lighten the pressure.</p><p>Thrill - Honestly speaking, he prefers a certain routine and is lowkey scared to try something new. He thought that you won't like new changes or experiences (he's wrong though). But when you told him that you don't mind a little spice in your relationship, he went all out.</p><p>Understanding - VERY EMPATHETIC. Wouldn't make fun of you, but instead comforts you.</p><p>Value - He looks at you like you're the only bright star in the milky way.</p><p>Wild Card - He noticed  you habit of playing with your fingers whenever you feel anxious. One day he gave you a ring with a small infinity symbol in it. "So whenever you feel anxious, you'll remember me and maybe feel a little better."</p><p>XOXO - very affectionate; loves to kiss your cheek and forehead + cuddles whenever you guys are free.</p><p>Yearning - He'll make more sketches and drawings of you whenever he misses you. You guys would talk in the telephone the whole night without thinking of the events that will happen the next day.</p><p>Zeal - He's more than willing to do anything and everything for you. You could even say that he is obsessed. </p><p> </p><p>— 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗲𝗱𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗱</p>
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<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Sign Of The Times</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>🌊 never forget you 🌊</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Sitting by the edge of the quarry was the highlight of your weekends. The moon was out, The stars are shining, The fireflies are lighting up, The beautiful scenery below you gaining your full attention. It was peaceful.</p><p>"I'm sorry" <br/>your lover beside you said.</p><p>you chuckled as you lied down on his lap.<br/>"you don't have to worry about anything"</p><p>"what will happen if you get hospitalised again and I'm not there by your side?" <br/>he argued.</p><p>"I won't get hospitalised again"<br/>an empty promise. False hope. Wishful thinking. You were convincing yourself as well.</p><p>Bill made his research. Your illness, it's rare, it has no cure. It was something you developed in your family blood. Death is rare.</p><p>Hallucination, seeing someone who's not there.</p><p>you started humming a tune you heard during your stay in the Denbrough's household.<br/>Bill placed his head over yours as he smiled and listened to you.</p><p>"they're not really there, are they?" <br/>you said as you stood up and looked behind your significant other. <br/>Richie, Eddie, Ben, Mike, Beverly, Stanley.</p><p>the brunette looked behind as well<br/>and sighed. He stroked your unusually unkept hair as he pulled you to his chest, and continued humming the tune as an attempt to calm you down.</p><p>Short term memory loss, easily forgetting things no matter how important it is to the patient.</p><p>"Bill?"<br/>you called out to your lover.<br/>he hummed in response before lifting your head from his chest.</p><p>"if i ever lose part of my memories, i promise that you and I's will remain"</p><p>Bill lazily smiled and pulled you back to his chest and then continued to hum.</p><p>"i love y-you"</p><p>"the moon is beautiful, isn't it?"</p><p>——————</p><p>High school graduates dancing the night away. It's their last get together before they part ways for college.</p><p>Below the full moon stands Bill Denbrough and you, Y/n L/n.</p><p>"[nickname]?"</p><p>Your eyebrow perked up as you stared at the stuttering graduate in front of you. Curious as to why he called you by the nickname that only your strand mates have called you.</p><p>"have we met before?"</p><p>——————</p><p>—inspired by a T.Kei book</p><p>—not edited</p>
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<a name="section0009"><h2>9. La Vi En Rose - Songfic</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Hold me close and hold me fast<br/>The magic spell you cast<br/>This is la vie en rose</p><p>Your fingers combed his soft hair as you both stared at the fireflies above you. Holding him close like this, you wished that you can stay like this forever. Happy thoughts, happy memories, happy teenagers.</p><p>"oh the th-t-things you do to m-my heart."</p><p>"did my spell work?"<br/>you joked.</p><p>this is perfection</p><p>When you kiss me heaven sighs<br/>And though I close my eyes<br/>I see la vie en rose</p><p>"yes y-your magic spell wo-worked."<br/>your lover said with sincerity.</p><p>before you can even reply, his lips were already against yours. This night went from one conversation to his lips on yours. Of course you're not complaining. His kisses were full of love and verity, that even the heavens would be jealous.</p><p>you continued to be one as you both closed your eyes, clearly enjoying the moment.</p><p>This is everything you wanted.</p><p>When you press me to your heart<br/>I'm in a world apart<br/>A world where roses bloom</p><p>you were the first to pull away when u felt breathless. Bill lazily smiled and pulled you to his chest.</p><p>"I can hear your heart beating"<br/>you said as you nuzzled in his chest even more.</p><p>"can you h-h-hear it beating f-fo-for you?"</p><p>"maybe I do"</p><p>Pools of red roses painted your cheeks at Bill's remarks. He wasn't any better either, he has been smiling like he has one the lottery. In defence, he thought that you're better than any other prize in the world.</p><p>this is lovely</p><p>And when you speak<br/>Angels sing from above<br/>Everyday words seem<br/>To turn into love songs</p><p>"can you sing for me?"<br/>your voice muffled.</p><p>"s-su-sure"</p><p>Bill's voice is very beautiful. You would oftentimes mistake it for angels singing. He said that it makes up for the lack of proper communication.</p><p>He started singing and you immediately felt your heartbeat quicken. His every word turned the song into a love song cause of the way he looked at you. He looked at you with appreciation and adoration.</p><p>He placed a strand of your hair behind your ear. Bill hesitated but continued to kiss your forehead, anyway. Your cheeks redden as you stared at his azure eyes.</p><p>"your pupils are dilated"</p><p>"that's because I'm looking at you" <br/>he exclaimed without stuttering.</p><p>this is romantic</p><p>Give your heart and soul to me<br/>And life will always be la vie en rose</p><p>"i love y-y-you"</p><p>"always and forever"<br/>you continued.</p><p>this is la vi en rose</p><p>——————</p><p>—not edited</p>
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<a name="section0010"><h2>10. to my dearest</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>the continuation of this will be in the next chapter</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>dear y/n,</p><p>your hair, still looks so soft somehow. your lips still pouring cherry words. your eyes never lost its shine even after everything you lost...we lost.</p><p>I just want to remember how good it felt to have someone who smelled like sunshine.</p><p>i know you're strong, we'll get past this. You'll find your way back to me, because you love me, right?</p><p>i'll see you when i see you.</p>
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<a name="section0011"><h2>11. forever dearest</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>continuation of "to my dearest," the previous chapter.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>dear bill,</p><p>i'm home. i wish you are here with me.<br/>it's been cloudy ever since you left.<br/>my forever dearest, please come back.</p>
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<a name="section0012"><h2>12. the act of Grieving</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>tw: cursing / mentions of suicide</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>In a world where you are born with a ring on your finger. The color of the ring indicates the feelings of your soulmates. </p><p>"blue...you're feeling blue, huh?" you whispered as you stared at your finger.</p><p>"I wonder what happened."</p><p>you combed your h/c hair as you answered your math homework.</p><p>"damn, wish my soulmate can hear my thoughts so he can help me with my homework."</p><p>"hold on, or is it a she?" </p><p> </p><p>...<br/>I̸f̸ y̸o̸u̸ h̸e̸a̸r̸d̸ m̸i̸n̸e̸ y̸o̸u̸ <br/>w̸o̸u̸l̸d̸ b̸e̸ c̸o̸n̸c̸e̸r̸n̸e̸d̸<br/>...</p><p> </p><p>"yellow...you're happy? good to know." you said as a smile crept on your face. </p><p> </p><p>...<br/>A̸h̸,̸ e̸v̸e̸n̸ i̸f̸ y̸o̸u̸'̸r̸e̸ f̸a̸k̸i̸n̸g̸ h̸a̸p̸p̸i̸n̸e̸s̸s̸ i̸t̸ s̸t̸i̸l̸l̸ s̸h̸o̸w̸s̸ t̸h̸e̸ c̸o̸l̸o̸r̸ y̸e̸l̸l̸o̸w̸<br/>...</p><p> </p><p>"gray...confused?" </p><p>...<br/>I̸'̸l̸l̸ e̸n̸d̸ i̸t̸ r̸i̸g̸h̸t̸ h̸e̸r̸e̸ r̸i̸g̸h̸t̸ n̸o̸w̸<br/>...</p><p>the following night, you were staring at your finger as you lie in bed.</p><p>"I wish that I'll find you soon"</p><p>you sighed and closed your eyes for a minute.</p><p>You were then greeted by an unusual black ring slipping off your finger, slowly turning into dust.</p><p>"bill?"</p><p>unbeknownst to you, tears were spilling down your eyes.</p><p>"who's bill? why am I crying? why do I have this urgent need to see him?"</p><p> </p><p>bullshit. soulmate. fate. fuck. </p><p> </p><p>you grieve for someone you haven't even met. </p><p> </p><p>—————<br/>—not edited</p>
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